NaNoWriMo

So, if the bike throws ya, get back on! (Yeah, I couldn't find a better photo.)

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Whoa. It's already December? Oh, that sneaky devil snuck up on me. Dear lord, I'm that much closer to being 29 and six months, that much closer to moving back to Miami, and about 25,000 words closer to having a novel completed.

You read that right. I'm writing a novel, and that, along with three other jobs, is why there was one, teeny, tiny "Let Me Be Frankie" post last month.

My fellow Wrimos and I took part in National Novel Writer's Month this past November. The goal was to write a novel of at least 50,000 words in one month, upload the thing on their Word Count Validator by midnight on the 30th, and then reap the praise, adulation and love of the masses. The little word count bar on a participant's NaNoWriMo page turned purple once the goal was reached, and a winner's certificate was involved.

I, er, didn't make the 50,000 word cut-off, while others posted 150,000 words on November 15th. Lousy cheaters!  Doesn't matter to me, people. The point to NaNoWriMo was to learn how to write without letting the inner critic-monster stop me (and you!) from writing. 

Honestly, I don't believe anyone can write a perfect, 50,000 + word novel in one month, despite Mr. King's best efforts. Every participant will now have to slog through editing the mess that they made on whatever medium they used to write; but HALLELUJAH, we have a mess to edit! 

Mine runs about 25,000 words. Without this little competition, it would have been a mere 2,000, and I would have been convinced that I'd done the most I could do.  I now know, with certainty, that I was full of it. Writing freely has gotten rid of the artificial constrictions I placed on myself to make it perfect the first time out. Most people cannot edit and write at the same time, nor should they. 

I'm not saying planning a story or outlining is unimportant. I think it's critical; you should know what your story is about, each scene should have a purpose, each character should exist to make the story work. But NaNoWriMo got me in the habit of writing every day, diligently, without the worry of turning out something perfect each time. It greased the wheels, and let some people be free enough to unleash their great ideas (stay tuned for my first kick ass novel!).  

Now to edit the damn thing! Hint for all you other Wrimos: go to the "Now What?" section, and commence the editing frenzy. Everyone else can participate in NaNoWriMo next year, as well as in Script Frenzy! 

Fall | Pear Bread

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I really dislike most pears. In fact, the only kind I eat raw with true enjoyment are red D'anjou pears.  They're so juicy, their flesh so creamy and sweet when you bite into them at their peak, it's quite unnecessary to cook them.

Sadly, I don't know of many D'anjou growers close by, so I settled for buying four (4!) pounds of nondescript, local Ohioan pears on my last local-food shopping spree (they were probably Bartlett pears- shudder). At $1.00, they were a steal and I was supporting the Borman Farm, so I felt doubly good about myself. 'Tis almost the season, right?

There was no way I was gnawing through four pounds of pears, so I promptly found a recipe for cinnamon pear bread and fed it to everyone who would try it. Honestly, it was a success. The bread was moist, the cinnamon was not overpowering, and the delicate pear flavor came through.  This is a great recipe for those of you who buy pears with good intentions, but never end up eating them (and, if I know my friends and family, they have pears moldering away in a pretty fruit basket as I type).  So, this one's for you!

Warning: grating the pears is a bit of an undertaking. Prepare to get messy and wet. I used all the juices that grating the pears brought out.  You should, too.

• 3 cups all-purpose flour
  
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
  
• 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
  
• 1 teaspoon salt
  
• 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
• 3/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
  
• 3 eggs, lightly beaten
  
• 2 cups brown sugar (my go-to: I just love the flavor)
  
• 2 grated cups of pears- prep this item last
  
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  
  1. Heat your oven to 350°F. Grease and flour either a 10-inch tube pan, or two 9-by-5-inch loaf pans. I used one 9-by-5-inch loaf pan and a muffin pan. I removed the muffins from the oven earlier than the larger pan.
  
  2. Combine the flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon in a large mixing bowl. Mix well, but you don't need to sift (don't you love making bread?).
  
  3. Peel and core pears, then grate them. You need to set aside 2 grated cups, again, including the sweet juice.
  
  4. In a medium bowl, combine the butter or oil, eggs, sugar, grated pear, and vanilla, and stir to mix everything well. Scrape the pear mixture into the flour mixture and stir just until the flour disappears and the batter is evenly moistened

5. Scrape the batter into the prepared pans and bake at 350°F for 50 to 60 minutes, or until the bread is golden-brown, firm on top, and a wooden skewer inserted in the center comes out clean. Again, I took my muffins out earlier. 

6. Let the bread cool on a towel or a wire rack, then turn over and serve. You could sprinkle it with powdered sugar, but it doesn't need it. Butter is better!

I'll admit that, halfway through grating ten small pears, I was growing suspicious that this was a stupid way to spend a Thursday night. Then I tried a warm piece of pear bread with butter, and I thought such nonsense no more. And you will probably be using larger pears, in which case you'll only have to grate 3 to 4.

Bottom line: get your grandmother or your significant other to make this for you if you have no patience, but get it made. It's that good. (Just don't leave the bread out overnight, and it'll stay moist for days!).

Catching Up, and Borman's Farm Lovin'

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Why, hello there. It's been a couple of weeks since I've posted anything fresh, hasn't it? I've been very busy this month, what with learning a new job, working two other jobs, and practicing scale after scale on my lovely Ibanez acoustic guitar. I've also been going to life-changing concerts (reviews to come), baking, and writing a terrible short story in which I hide too much information from the reader.

I'll get to all those posts before October is over, I swear, but enjoy these photos in the meantime. Yes, I have a Picasa account and a Flickr account somewhere, but since October is still the Local Food Challenge month (remember that?) I thought I'd show you some of the fresh, local produce I bought down at the Borman Family Farm. The farm has been running since Ron Borman's grandmother decided to open it back in the 30s. Ron's granddaughter actually helped him weigh the squash.  Isn't it cool that the next generation is training to take over? Well, it's Amherst, OH. She *might* want to make her living off her family's farm...

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Lovely apples from the Borman orchard.  See those little pears to the right? A delicious pear bread recipe featuring ten of those babies is up next. Yes, ten. 

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Not shown: delicious, crisp bunches of basil for only $1.00. I made a very disagreeable pesto; my family would be ashamed. 

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Oh, butternut, acorn, and spaghetti squash: you remind us that winter is a-coming.

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Great peppers. I made a sofrito with them.  To the right of the eggplant: say goodbye to the last of the sweet summer corn. Bye!

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Eat Local: Rosemary Potato Wheat Bread

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I walked into the Oberlin market this afternoon to buy my daily serving of "local" fruit, since I'm taking the Eat Local Challenge seriously. I found the little pears and apples easily, but I can't just run in and out of a store efficiently. I like to meander and rifle through the product, making myself want more things than I need. This time it wasn't just product that kept me looking; no, the most gorgeous, earthy, pizza-like, bread-y aroma filled the room. I stepped into the little bakery next to the cash register and was pointed toward lovely, freshly-baked loaves of rosemary potato bread.

It was still warm and, thankfully, the flavor matched the promising aroma. My roommate and I walked around Oberlin finishing our errands while eating large chunks of the loaf. Half of it was gone twenty minutes after buying it. Do you see those weird muffins under the rich loaves? Those are garam masala muffins. The bread was so good that I'm willing to try the garam masala muffins next time I'm there.

Next up: a review of old school milk. You know, the kind that was taken from a cow just down the road and presented in a glass jar. Wish me luck!

My Father's Kitchen: Ossobucco

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This was literally the last of it.

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My father made his amazing ossobucco for a friend's birthday recently. I visited the night before the party and watched the beautiful dish simmer while drinking Rum Barbancourt with him. The aroma would have pleased the gods, as ossobucco is a magical dish: veal shank braised in white wine, vegetables, and broth until it's falling off the bone- and then the bone gives up its marrow. That's what I wait for, spoon in hand.

He served it with risotto alla milanese, a saffron risotto, but I prefer it with polenta. It was so tasty that I almost forgot to take a photo of it- a good sign, right? I managed to take a shot of the last bits, when the risotto alla milanese was finished. I used that crusty bread to sop up the broth.

I asked him for his recipe, and he adapted it to serve two:

• olive oil
  
• 1 carrot
  
• 1/2 onion
  
• 2 cloves of garlic
  
• 3 bay leaves
  
• 2 small sticks of celery, diced
  
• 1 rosemary branch
  
• 1 tsp. oregano
  
• 4 pieces of veal shank or ossobuco
  
• 1 tomato diced
  
• 2 cups of beef broth
  
• 1-2 cups of white wine
  
• salt and pepper to taste
  
  1. Sauté the carrots, celery, onions, and garlic in olive oil over medium heat, then add the peppercorn, bay leaves, rosemary, and oregano.
  2. Brown the veal shanks in a separate, large pot in butter.
  3. Add the diced tomato to the veal shanks, fry it, then add beef broth and white wine as needed to keep it covered. Add the prepared vegetables.
  4. Cover the pot and cook it for three hours at a slow pace (simmer).
  5. Add salt to your taste, and serve it with risotto or with polenta.

I included a link to making risotto alla milanese, and you can buy polenta or make your own, which I recommend.

My father's version of ossobucco alla milanese has quite a few more vegetables than the "traditional" dish, and I asked him a couple questions about how he learned to make it. Read on, if you're interested:

Christien Meindertsma : on Pigs

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I'm sure you've all heard you can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. Well, that's technically not true. What's more, you'll find the sow's bristles in some brands of bread and that sow's bones and connective tissue in your gelatin-which some breweries use as a filter for their beer.

Christien Meindertsma, a designer from the Netherlands, spent three years following pig 05049. She documented at least 185 products sourced from that one particular pig. I didn't know half of the ones she spoke of (wait until you get to the hemoglobin cigarette filters-priceless!). Bet you won't have heard of all of them, either.

Thanks, IHC.

Cute Wine Gifts

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As seen on Giftsanddec.com

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I found a darling gift to give my fellow red wine drinkers during my internet meandering. Wine Wipes, petite, citrus-flavored wipes housed in small compacts with a mirror inside the lid, were created by Borracha, LLC to wipe off that purple-hued film people get after a glass or two of their favorite Barbera d'Asti (or whatever they drink).

The people at Borracha state that Wine Wipes were specially developed with a sommelier so the citrus blossom flavor would not interfere with the wine. I read that the wipes will taste slightly salty because, well, salt and baking soda make up part of the ingredients list.

That won't deter me; I'll be ordering a pack shortly, and I'll get back to you about the flavor and efficacy. You can buy them from Winewipes.com (as of today, they're selling three for $20), or whichever cutesy local boutique is offering them. Happy, sexy drinking!

Re:visiting Peru | Mika's Lomo Saltado

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The goods.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I'm getting back to eating Peruvian food thanks to the lovely Miss Mika Sobieski. Mika is my new roommate and an amazing cook who spends her summers preparing breakfast, lunch, and dinner for 150 teens at a Spanish immersion camp in Minnesota. Random, right? But through her contact with Argentinians, Peruvians, Columbians, and whatever else, she's brought mate, quinoa, all sorts of wine, and Peruvian food back into my life.

You all will love her because she made the best Peruvian dish in existence for us last night: lomo saltado. This could very well be the most popular dish in Peru, and with damn good reason. Marinated steak, home-made french fries, delicious rice, and red onions sautéed with tomatoes and cilantro (and a ton of spices) is a great combination. You won't be able to stop eating it if you make it right!

Mika made her version of lomo saltado for us, which included green bell pepper and jalapeños. You'll be seeing another variation of this classic, delicious dish in a few weeks! This makes enough for two, but it can be expanded for more.

The ingredients:

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We're not big on censorship.

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• Beef sirloin or tenderloin for two (we used a 12 oz. strip steak)
  
• Enough red wine to cover the meat
  
• 2 tbsp. red wine vinegar
  
• 2 tbsp. soy sauce
  
• 1 clove of garlic
  
• 1 jalapeño pepper, diced
  
• salt and pepper to taste
  
• 1/2 red onion
  
• 1/2 tomato
  
• 1/2 green pepper
  
• 1 tbsp. fresh chopped cilantro
  
• juice of one lime
  
• 2 tbsp. cumin
  
• rice
  
• french fries
  
  1. Slice the steak into cubes, then marinate it with the soy sauce, red wine vinegar, a good red wine (we used a Rioja), garlic, black pepper, and salt for at least 20 minutes.
  2. Start making the rice. We made one cup of parboiled rice, because we love it. I used the beef fat to saute diced garlic, added a touch of olive oil, and continued with the rice preparation.
  3. Prepare the french fries. They're supposed to be made from scratch, but we were in a time crunch. We cheated and bought frozen Texas home fries, so at this point we put them in the oven to bake.
  4. Slice the red onion and green pepper into petals and dice half a tomato in large chunks; set aside.
  5. Once the 20 minutes are up, place the meat and marinade in a pot on medium heat.
  6. Sauté for five minutes, then add the lime juice, red onion, bell pepper, cumin, and fresh cilantro.
  7.Sauté for five more minutes, then add the diced tomato. Cover the pot and simmer for 5 minutes, or until the onions and green peppers are soft.
  8. Place rice on a plate, serve the meat and juices over the rice, add french fries, and devour.
  

The Way We Should Read

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His dorsal stream can only tolerate very low doses of activation.

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Jonah Lehrer wrote about his wishes for the future of reading on Wired.com last week. He introduced Stanislas Dehaene's work on the neural anatomy of reading (well, it's a first for me, anyway!) and its possible applications on e-reading, and I think it's pretty neat.

It turns out that the brain contains two pathways for making sense of words; the ventral route and the dorsal stream. The ventral route is activated by "routinized, familiar passages" of words, and it relies on the visual word form area (VWFA). The brain goes the ventral route the majority of the time (ha), but certain contexts activate the dorsal stream; for example, sentences with complex clauses, poor punctuation, and even those written illegibly. Basically, any sentences that require more conscious effort to perceive lead to an activation of the dorsal pathway, and supposedly, more comprehension and appreciation for meaning.

Lehrer is worried that the ease that better tech brings to reading e-books (through brighter screens) will have a negative effect on our reading comprehension, and even our willingness to read harder texts. This is true for me. I know I've responded to people with "too long/did not read"(TL/DNR) on many forums. I find a perverse joy in doing so, especially with inane posts (I suspect most of my readers have gotten to that point with this one!), but I recognize that I do it with quality posts at times as well.

I know many friends who do the same, and that's sort of sad. Lehrer's fear, that "before long, we’ll become so used to the mindless clarity of e-ink – to these screens that keep on getting better – that the technology will feedback onto the content, making us less willing to endure harder texts", is already a reality for many.

Anyway, I admit I wasn't familiar with the neural anatomy presented in his article, but it makes sense. My two cents: I would imagine that this dorsal activation also occurs when one reads text in a foreign language. I notice that I HAVE to pay more attention to the sentences I'm reading and the words I'm sounding out when they are new to me. I do feel my brain working when I translate a passage from Italian to English. The process is not automatic, not at all, and I find I appreciate the meaning of words much more when they're new.

Lehrer's solution is to have e-book readers offer a function to make reading a little more difficult, supposedly to activate the dorsal stream. I don't see that happening, but for all of us who care about keeping our brains engaged, dim those computers and bring out those old poetry anthologies once in a while (shudder). Couldn't hurt, right?

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Re:visiting Peru | Causa Rellena

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The finished product is on the left.

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Causa is one of my favorite Peruvian comfort foods. My grandmother made it for us as children, and once in a while I made it with her. The tangy and lime-y flavor of the potatoes, the creamy tuna, the spice of the red onion and the peppers, and the buttery avocado just make a great combination. Despite the apparent randomness of ingredients, this dish looks beautiful and tastes delicious.

I prefer to come home to causa already made and ready to eat, of course, but since my grandmother is thousands of miles away, I make do with making it myself. The neat thing about this dish is that you can substitute any seafood for the tuna. I've had it with fresh shrimp and with octopus in Lima, Peru. This version is homey, with canned tuna and extra mayonnaise, and makes enough for six.

I used small bowls this time, but you can use a 9" springform pan.

• 2 lb yellow potatoes
  
• 3 tbsp olive oil
  
• aji verde, rocoto or any hot pepper sauce
  
• juice of 1 lime
  
• salt
  
• pepper
  
• 1 can of tuna
  
• 1 cup of mayonnaise
  
• 1 sliced avocado
  
• 1 sliced hard boiled egg
  
• 1/4 cup of diced red onion
  
• chopped parsley
  
  1.Boil potatoes in salted water, peel them while they're still warm, and pass them through a potato ricer. Don't have one? Mash 'em with a fork!
  2. Set the potatoes in a bowl and mix in the olive oil, hot pepper, lime juice, salt, and black pepper.
  3. Divide the potatoes into 3 equal portions.
  4. Line your oiled glass bowl or springform pan with one portion.
  5. Mix the tuna with 1/2 of the mayonnaise, and place it on top of the first layer of potatoes.
  6. Add the second layer of potatoes.
  7. Add the rest of the mayonnaise, then layer the avocado, the boiled egg, and the red onion over it.
  8. Add the last layer of mashed potatoes, cover the dish, and let it set for a half hour. Decorate with a little parsley, or with sliced avocado and boiled eggs, as I did.
  
  

Happy Honey Day!

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OMG, I knew it... via Iwillhaveamillionofyourbabies.wordpress.com

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Dear God! I almost missed celebrating Honey Day! And no, I'm not being sarcastic. I love bee juice. Incidentally, this post isn't going to be about the urban bee-keeping trend, or a lament about "where have all the bees gone?", or maybe even about honey, much...

That stuff is neat, but I'll let you guys Google it. I'm actually just really excited about a recipe I found. I haven't made it yet, but one of the ingredients is condensed milk, the most delicious form of milk on the planet. My family and I pour it on everything (Peruvians do that). Oh, and the recipe calls for honey, too.

Peach and Orange Honey Pops, from L.A. Times Test Kitchen.

• 1 1/2 cups full-fat Greek yogurt
  
• 1/2 cup whole milk
  
• 1/4 cup sweetened condensed milk
  
• 1/4 cup honey (preferably orange blossom)
  
• 4 cups sliced peaches (4 to 5 peaches)
  
• 2 tablespoons apricot preserves
  
  1. Place the yogurt, milk, condensed milk, honey, peaches and preserves in a blender. Blend until smooth.
  
  2. Divide the mixture evenly among the pop molds, pouring so that you leave about one-half inch of headroom at the top. Once they are filled, tap the molds gently against the counter, allowing the liquid to settle evenly into the molds and dislodging any air bubbles that may have formed. Cover the molds and fit with popsicle sticks, if necessary. Freeze the molds until completely firm, at least 5 hours. For easy unmolding, run the frozen pops under warm water for 10 to 15 seconds before removing them.
  
  Each of 8 popsicles: 170 calories; 5 grams protein; 26 grams carbohydrates; 1 gram fiber; 6 grams fat; 4 grams saturated fat; 12 mg. cholesterol; 24 grams sugar; 34 mg. sodium.
  
  

Wow. They even break down the calories for us. Bravo, L.A. Test Kitchen. Bravo.

MasterChef Kind of Sucks

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He's full of whimsy. via Delawareonline.com

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There are way too many cooking competition-type shows these days, but I'm giving MasterChef a chance because I need a show to work out to.

The main draw for me is not the contestants, though. I'm wasting my precious time on it for Gordon Ramsay, because anything involving G.R. in a cooking version of American Idol is bound to be bawdy, entertaining, and informative- most of the time.

In case you've never heard of it, MasterChef is a quest to uncover the best amateur chef in the U.S. (why, yes, it IS a rendition of a show from England!). Each contestant has to earn a MasterChef apron to compete for the prize; thirty made it out of thousands of applicants, and there can be only one MasterChef. The winner gets gets $250K, a cookbook, and all of the glory in all the land.

Ramsay is joined by Graham Elliot and Joe Bastianich, no lightweights in the restaurant world. If you're wondering which one will be the Simon Cowell of the show, you'll be happy to know this show has two of them! Hint: it's not sweet pushover Elliot.

We luck out with two versions of Cowell: Joe B's version is the metro serious business dude with the poker face who has trouble hiding when he has the hots for someone. Ramsay's version is a mood swinging, fire-breathing, yet lovable one.

Aside from watching the hosts have fits over both the great and terribly-composed dishes, there's nothing much going on as the show is trite and a little behind the times (nothing tops the classic Iron Chef, and we already have Top Chef and a slew of other knock-offs).

Every contestant gets his or her own little heart-rending background story, replete with slow motion shots of hugs with family members. The tearful close-ups cultivate a sense that surely, so and so will win because they have enough trauma in their lives to fuel them to success (that worked well for Batman, anyway)...

...at least the judges keep you guessing. Cue the contrived suspension during judgments: "I need you to take off your aprons....and tie them back on again, tighter, because you've made it on to MasterChef!".

That's priceless.

It also induces viewer rage, and we all know rage is the best fuel for work outs.

Angelo's | Reuben

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Whatthe?

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What makes a reuben fantastic? Thick layers of corned beef, melted Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, (rich) thousand-island dressing, and dark rye bread soaked in butter. It sounds simple, doesn't it?

The perfect reuben is simple! It is also simple to ruin.

Enter: Angelo's of Ann Arbor, MI.

The Angelinos want to make a good reuben, and the effort shows. They use thick layers of fillings, but where's the rye? The substitution of thick, crusty bread white bread is a huge misstep, and utterly ruins the sandwich.

No matter how you slice it, though, Angelo's reuben sandwich is a flop. There in't enough meat, sauerkraut, or dressing in the world to hide that thick, white bread crust, or Angelo's soul-deep disdain for proper Jewish deli fare.

Zingerman's | Best Ribs Ever

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Where's Swayze?

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The best ribs I have ever tasted were the "pit smoked spare ribs" served to me at Ann Arbor's beloved Zingerman's Roadhouse this past Monday.

Zingerman starts with ribs from specially-bred "Niman Ranch" pigs, slow-cooks them for nine hours, then serves them with not-quite-too-tangy "Alex's red rage tomato BBQ sauce", mashed potatoes, and yellow mustard corn slaw. A thin layer of sauce is baked into the ribs (below), and the flavor runs through all of the pork, so that every bite is flavorful and amazing.

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The knife means you don't have to share!

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The intense flavor comes partly from the slow-cooking and smoking process, which helps to bring out the dry rub. Throughout the process, the ribs are basted in a "Memphis-style" sauce. A crisped layer of pork skin is left on one side that I would gleefully stab my dining companions over, if they tried to take it from me.

Speaking of gleefully stabbing things, a big part of the flavor profile comes the free-range ranch pork; the tenderness of the meat is striking, and I feel better knowing telling myself that the pigs I was eating had lived a lovely life ...

... at $19 per half-rack, those pigs had damn well better lead a happy life - but, whether they do or don't, I'm sure they'd agree that these ribs were to die for!

Cures for Boredom | Chocolate Covered Strawberries

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Use less salt.

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I love Mayan style chocolate, which I like to call "chocolate with a kick" since it's been flavored with savory, spicy peppers. I love the homey warmth of honey in my sweets, as well, so when I had an 11PM sweet craving the other night and ZERO desire to leave my apartment, I checked the kitchen: strawberries, chocolate, cayenne pepper powder, honey.

It's GO time, people.

• 1/2 cup of semi-sweet chocolate chips
  
• 3 tbsp of milk (or cream, if you have it!)
  
• 1 tsp honey
  
• 1 tsp cayenne pepper
  
• 1 cup strawberries
  
  1. Set up a double boiler for melting your chocolate.
  2. Put the milk, chocolate chips, honey, and cayenne pepper in your double boiler and melt.
  3. Dip your strawberries in the melted chocolate, and set on a cookie sheet.
  4. Cool for 10 minutes, then take out and sprinkle rock salt over them.
  5. Cool for 10-15 more minutes if you can wait, or or just devour all of them as quickly as possible while watching True Blood on HBO.
  

I added a bit of rock salt to bring out a little more sweetness in the chocolate - but if you know what's good for you, you'll use a bit less than what's shown here ...

... looks good on camera, though. Enjoy!

Slow Train | Reuben Pub Pie

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Pastrami is the most sensual of the cured meats.

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I tasted my first Gray House Pub Pie at Slow Train today. I, of course, went with the reuben pub pie (because I'm George Costanza).

The experience started off a bit shakily, with the server microwaving the pie right in front of my best "look of horror" face. They claimed the pies were made with 100% sweet butter, however, and there was enough of that to coat my fork in liquid gold when I cut into it. That gave me hope - for a moment.

Something was off with the pastrami. A call to Gray House the next day (Why - yes, I am insane!) confirmed that the company uses roast beef for the pie's filling.

The point is: Gray House does not do reubens well, but does anyone outside of a Manhattan deli?

In any event, the crust good enough that I'm willing to forgive Gray House. I'm so willing to forgive that I've already made plans to drive out to the source and try a freshly-baked Gray House pub pie, despite my experience with the reuben ...

... the microwave, however, was unforgivable. Bad, Slow Train! Bad!

Summer | Lemon Blueberry Crumble

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All that lemon Pledge is making me hungry!

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I grew tired of drinking blueberry smoothies two days into making them. The only antidote to all that healthy eating (while not wasting the blueberries I'd picked) was something extra sugary and buttery.

Enter: the lemon blueberry crumble.

I've adapted a Smitten Kitchen recipe because I don't always have refined sugar or cornstarch at the ready for baking, substituting brown sugar for white sugar without changing the ratios.

• 1 cup brown sugar
  
• 1 tsp baking powder
  
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
  
• 1 cup cold unsalted butter
  
• 1 egg
  
• 1/4 tsp salt
  
• zest and juice of one lemon
  
• 4 cups fresh blueberries
  
• 1/2 cup brown sugar
  
• 6 tsp flour
  
  
  1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Grease a 9×13 inch pan.
  2. In a medium bowl, stir together 1 cup sugar, 3 cups flour, and baking powder. Mix in salt and lemon zest. Use a fork or pastry cutter to blend in the butter and egg. The dough should be crumbly. Place half of your dough into the prepared pan.
  3. In another bowl, stir together the sugar, flour (or 3 tsps of cornstarch, if you have it) and lemon juice. Mix in the blueberries. Sprinkle the blueberry mixture evenly over the crust. Crumble remaining dough over the berry layer.
  4. Bake in preheated oven for 45 minutes, or until top is slightly brown. Cool completely before cutting into squares, or the blueberries will ooze out.
  5. Refrigerate the crumble, or give away to friends who love lemony, tart desserts.
  

NOTE:
The original recipe simply called it a "blueberry crumble", but the amount of lemon zest and juice involved overpowered my delicious, freshly-picked blueberries, so the name change was a must - but it still tasted good, according to my guinea pigs friends.

A few days in the fridge mellowed out the tart lemon flavor of the crumble. Next time, though, I'll make one with just half a lemon (or maybe none at all) to get more of a blueberry flavor. I'll try some cinnamon on it as well.

Stay tuned!

Summer | Frozen Blueberries

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[insert "Smurfs" joke here]

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I picked eight pounds of blueberries last time I went to the farm.

Lest I become sick of blueberry smoothies, or lose all of my hard-earned crop to decay, I decided to learn how to freeze blueberries properly.

Teh interwebz told me to scatter the blueberries I wanted to freeze across cookie sheets, one blueberry thick. Google also warned that washing the berries would toughen their skins, but since I would be using most of them for smoothies, I didn't consider that a deal breaker.

It takes at least half an hour to freeze the berries, and it I'd read that freezer burn took about 2 days to set in, so I went out to a movie and separated them into freezer bags when I got back.

You can see the finished sheet of frozen blueberries in the photo above.

Finally, there was one thing my web-based lessons in blueberry freezings did not prepare me for: I absolutely LOVED the taste and texture of the frozen blueberries!

Summer | Blueberry Picking

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Peaceful and scrumptious.

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Ready for the most important rule for picking blueberries? "You must eat while you pick", according to the cute jail bait working the shed. If you're going to do that, you'd better pick organic blueberries.

I went to Chance Creek Blues. You can eat them while you pick and not choke on pesticides. Chances are you'll be chowing on some all-natural fertilizer and insect larvae in the process, but that's part of getting back to nature!

Rule two: pick the darkest berries. Have you ever heard someone say, "The darker the berry, the sweeter the juice"? Well, they know their blueberries.

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Red means stop, green blue means go.

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Rule three: Blueberries are blue. See the red blueberry in my palm above? Don't pick blueberries that look like that. It's tart, waiting to ripen, and it isn't even blue! Blueberries are one of those pain in the ass fruits that don't ripen off the vine, so it's a totally wasted berry, and if too many people pick unripened berries they can ruin the farm's future prospects - ruining the fun for everyone else.

One last note: while I was at the farm, the jail bait advised me to "stick to one bush" and get all the ripe fruit. That may not seem like the most efficient way to pick berries, but I almost filled my bucket picking on just two bushes. That's FOUR POUNDS OF BLUEBERRIES!

Oh well ... at least I won't have to buy any more blueberries for a while!

If you want to try your hand at picking berries, check out PickYourOwn.Org for local growers who will let you get your hands dirty while you eat healthy.

The Dangers of Blueberry Picking

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Picking fruit in Florida can get really ugly. We hang with gators, sun-bathing cotton mouth snakes, rattlesnakes, an assortment of mean spiders, and we all spray poisonous chemicals on our bodies to deter disease-carrying mosquitoes. You can imagine my surprise when, while picking blueberries down at Chance Creek Blues, I observed this warning:

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They forgot to mention "butterflies" and "sunshine".

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My first reaction was that the notice was a joke. The farm is located on the outskirts of Oberlin, a liberal college town full of hipster, ironic Millenials, after all.

I tested my hypothesis on the gentle college graduate manning the shed. I told him I'd been chased by a bee for a couple of feet. He looked startled and asked (very cutely and earnestly), "Ohmygosh, are you okay? You weren't stung, were you?"

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I laughed all the way to the blueberry bushes, high on being the biggest predator in Ohio. My competition that day consisted of a couple of fat beetles and grandmothers. I have to admit, I'm loving it here.